The clean fresh smell of the new year!! Buy one get one free!

Hey... how's it going? Been a while. You look good.

Uh...

...Awkward silence...

..longing stare...


Uh

Okay, It's been a month... or four. But I'm back now, and I'm blogcasting (Patten it!) from a spankin' new computer! The best part is I have it all to myself. Which means two beautiful things: More opportunities to not see the sun and more opportunities to blog. As we come to this new year, I will be here for you, and by seacrest we're going to make it baby! *Cue the montage*

Now, so much awesome has happened since I last blogged. OBAMA. So much greatness I can't even begin. Jim and Pam got engaged, my heart soars with the eagles nest! And the entertainment value that is Gary Busey on Celebrity rehab! "Whenever I start talking too much say cut"

Although just as many awful things happened this year as awesome I prefer not to focus on it. The news is doing enough of that already. "WE ARE ALL GOING TO LOOSE OUR JOBS, LOOSE OUR HOMES AND DIE." I'm so tired of it. As much as I know how real the deficit is I also know a schtick when I see it. Stop repeating yourself, Anderson coops, and tell us how things can get better. It does nothing for your looks, and that takes a lot.

But that's life, huh? Great things happen and horrible things happen. It's what makes the world turn and what grants us a fresh start in the new year. I learned many useful things this year. Nelle makes me smile big, dominating your family of four in Wii sports does NOT grant you athletic ability or qualify you as an athlete of any kind and Tina Fey is King.
And right now I'm about to eat two too many egg rolls and stay up way past their bed time with my family. What ever the lords of fear and money say, I'm okay. I still have chinese food.

Love counting down to a big new year of crazy.

: )

Writing and emotional profoundness of an extra terestrial...

Hola Interneticans! Greetings! The other day I was wondering why we do the things we do, like really? Now I'm not talking about deep psychological actions, no freudian I have ten cats because I'm in love with my mother type of thing. Just what motivates us day to day? As a writer (oh, seacrest, that is way pretentious "Ahs auh wrightah") or as some one who enjoys creating made up people who live out our fantasy lives those motives are kind of pivotal. A lot of times after I write some dialogue like:

female protagonist with daddy issues and a mild drug addiction: What are you doing here?
Male reluctant leader with a savior complex (sounds rather jacky sheps, no? Maybe winehouse too.): Nothing. What are you doing?
female protagonist with daddy issues and a mild drug addiction: I was looking for you.
Male reluctant leader with a savior complex: you were?
female protagonist with daddy issues and a mild drug addiction: Yes. [she walks up to him, perhaps a slight limp or a twitching left eye] I'm dying-
Male reluctant leader with a savior complex: Nonono
female protagonist with daddy issues and a mild drug addiction: [As she dies] I... I love [she dies]
Male reluctant leader with a savior complex: NOOOOOOO!

After that do you say, "well I get that, cause that happens every day"... not really. Basically I've found myself asking why do these character make the choices they make? And, would this happen realistically within the binds of the story? I mean, you can ask this in any setting. Even if the character is living on a planet beyond our solar system with three heads it's realistic for the character to ask themselves if they want to decapitate one of the heads to fit in with a two headed society. (This also comes along with deep inner struggle which can buy you at least five pages of witty and poignant Meredith grey esq dialogue.)

Now as I am in between two quite inadequate scripts for the coming year for the highly profound film maker Ava Awesome I've found this question, although at times tedious, highly affective. It gives characters deeper development and grants them several layers. This layering also makes them more relateable because you are asking these fictional characters real questions that a real audience asks themselves everyday, (although these films are intended to have an imaginary audience screening as well. We don't discriminate.)

Well now that I've ranted and made your eyes bleed (Holy shizbuckets did anyone see the x-files movie yet? lasgosgnalknegzdlnkgdklgdknl!!!) I'd just like to say something witty... but a las a real person doesn't always have something witty to say. And I'd really liked to pass as a human being before the planet of two heads (BiCapa!) comes back for me.

Love phoning home, well at least when it creates a dramatic story climax and requires strings in the score and a hearty supply of kleenex.

: )

Summer for the hermit crab

So a few weeks ago I know where you were. You were looking up at the sky praying to thor/sam champion to make the heat not come. And yet like every year you found yourself walking the streets of baking concrete stumbling through your doorway with your shirt half off because the humidity levels are about twice as much between the cleave. So as to avoid the heat and those jolly ole' sun fun people this summer here's some stuff you can do to effectively preserve your shut in status.

Television:

Now if you haven't joined the cults of the office and Lost I don't know what to do with you and it is your social responsibility to take a few days in your pajamas and hagandaz to watch these two glorious contributions to the world but if you have then here's a few more shows you should be watching and referencing within your daily life.

30 Rock - Hey everybody, lets let Tina Fey change our lives. Man oh man, idol status.

Battlestar Galactica - Don't laugh this little gem of nerdfighter off. Yes it is a space show but that is hardly the biggest part of it. With a social message BSG successful gives the viewer corruption, sex and pure badassness in no gravity.

Weeds - I personally am marathoning this now. So good.

Arrested Development - Do you want to be the first analrapist? Join us tobias funkes of the world and pick this too good show too fast gone up.

Jon and Kate + 8 - This show is addictive. It's so wrong and so right and adorable and heart warming and goes great with a glass of milk and a smile.

Music

Give Feist, Ben folds, and coldplay a new, old or sun burned ear.

Books

Me talk Pretty one Day by David Sedaris

The bell Jar by Sylvia Plath

The Other Boyeln Girl by Phillippa Gregory

Computer fun stuffers

Postsecret.com

Photoshop (harness your skills, young grasshoppers)

The Sims 2 (Bored? No longer my son)



Well here's the thing friends I've been having quiet the summer beneath the sun, and you know the outside world. It was scary at first but you know it's good to know you can come home at night your tv waiting with a freshly prepared set of DVR'd goodness. When the two summer worlds collide it's pretty glorious.

love sun rays and computer rays

: )

So basically, we thrust in hallways...

So deflecting from Emo shit


OH MY GOD


Jack and Kate get together. And have SEX a lot of SEX


My ship does it in the shower... so... thus I have magical powers

As Ava awesomeness knows, reenactments are in order till January


Love filling the void and fictional romance

will be back soon with talk about the Lost

: )

Walking the Plank (Without intentions of being Awkity, insightful, pretentious or anything)

Do you remember in Peter Pan when little Wendy Darling walks the plank on captain hooks boat after refusing to sign herself and the Darling boys away to his ship? I swear I would sit there in front of the TV fiend status watching it over and over again. Well lately I've had the Wendy image stuck in my head. In bed at night when I'm trying to push out thoughts of all the work I have to do and replace it with contemplations over the details of the wedding dress that Pam WILL wear eventually (Omg office way to crush me with lack of ring on Beasley finger). So this "Walk the Plank, Wendy Darling" image constantly rushes to me like some weird psychological stuffers. You know there's a lot of times when I'm ready to tackle everything, when I ready to storm the day, but at the end of said day at the moments of choice and ultimatum it becomes extraordinarily easier to ignore it all. Hoping for it to pass. So there I am under the clean linens in my little white girl room and I realize that when you come down to it the more I struggle against the machine the closer I get to the edge of the plank, hands tied.

In any words I'm no Wonder woman... I could be but I'm too chicken to crack the whip and deflect the offence with my swanky gold bracelets .

Maybe I'll kick some ass. But, you know, it sounds easier tomorrow.


: )

And you were there, and you!

Don't look at me that way. So... so maybe I said I was going out to buy a coke and never came back. I'm sorry okay, I'm sorry I missed your graduation from understanding that Benji linus owns us all... I know it's rough, seeing all the other kids out there with their attentive bloggers, but you were kind of an accident, a cyber child via virtual lovin' of sorts... sooo How's your mother? Heard she's been working her spiky gelled hair off on the ole' AI (love u Ry guy) Well I'm back now... that's what matters, right? RIGHT?!

So yes I've been MIA as of a recent month. I've been really swamped at school and writing a new script. I've gone into a kind of bubble of work, which also means I've grown a beard and have become a functioning oxycodone addict. But what an Amazing time for everything this kid has ever enjoyed.


First of all

Vaginas - seriously. Vaginas have had it rough the past few weeks. With Hillary Clinton and her vag run campaign I worry for my fellow Dems, all this political drama pulls at my heartstrings. I really hope a love triangle starts up soon. It would make everything much easier for us American public. And now Vaginas have this Kristen chic. I mean Spitzer? He just couldn't have a better name. Also Fatima from Americas next top model with her female circumcision, I'm pretty excited to see how that plays out.

American Fucking Idol - Man wow, I'm actually really into it this year. I always say I'm not going to watch, that I must go against that of the American whole grain but then Ryan and Simon start flirting and Paula's making out with her fists. I just can't look away and it pulls me back in. This year though I succumbed. Skipped all the sexual tension fore-playness with the television and just watched. And I'd just like to say Jason Castro, I will have your babies, it will have dreads and play the guitar and we will name it honey bea.

Music - Check out Stars. They reign from talent trusty Canada.

Ava Awesomeness - This kid. I really enjoy. She is my little Chicken. I just had to say, she is profound.

HBO - In Treatment is my new addiction. It's tragically realistic. It's pretty amazing.

Movieness - If I divulge into this now I'll never stop. I'll just say that mastering the accent of Daniel Plainview is kind of my life's goal "Ay haav a compeeetitioun en mey"

Lost - Dear Lord, thank you for making Lost the delicious orgy it was always meant to be. This years been good, realll good like OMFG Sayid works for Bennikins?! Frieghties eat grenades! Jack and Kate Drink coffee and have eye sex in courtrooms and parking garages! Xanadu! Crazy bleed from brain out the nose time travelness Dezy! JIN??????!!! Happy Tom Friendly came out of the closet with Arturo though, made me smile in my good ole liberal way. Thank you Thank you, I've been to the island gap too. More like Oceanic Sexa

Vid of deliousness - Hand Vagina. Looking for the origins of Nina? search no further. This is basically the summary of my days. I'm not exactly human.





Any ways, shall return in brief but just thought I'd holla out to u.


Love coming home

Thank god for Ruby slippers, sense memory and Mapquest

: )

Valentines Day... My Heart is still beating! YAY!

Happy Valentines Day Lurvers!

Oprah just had this couple on. He made a commercial which aired during Veronica Mars (her fave show) in whihc he asks her to marry him. OMG Helllzzz yes. I could only wish lol

Valentines day is uber fun. Today was cake in Lincoln center and coming up with ship names YAYAYAYAY

Here's a few count downs of the most heart wrenching songs and scenes. Definetely feel free to list some of your own as well!

Fifteen of the most profoundly montagable Love songs playing on my ipod

1. Falling slowly - The Frames
2. The Blowers Daughter - Damien Rice
3. Red Right Ankle - The Decemberist
4. Wonderwall - Oasis
5. So Real - Jeff Buckley
6. Scratch - Kendall Payne
7. Grace -Kate Havnevik
8. Anyone Else But you - The Moldy Peaches
9. Hold You in my Arms - Ray LaMontange
10. The Luckiest - Ben Folds
11. Samson - Regina Spektor
12. I just don't think I'll ever get over you - Colin Hay
13. Let Go - Frou Frou
14. Fix you - Coldplay
15. The Way I am - Ingrid Michaelson


The Eleven Most Heart grabbing Scenes (Haha i'm totally bootleg and my computer won't let me just one copy of the videos... so just avert you're eyes from the bad twin)

1. Bambi: Oh man this scene, traumatizing. What grabs your heart is that it tends to be the first time little kids realize the harsh truths about Mortality.




2. Sophie's Choice: This is so diffacult to watch. It's one of those scenes that catch you so much that you feel as if you are there and are having to make that choice



3. Jim tells Pam he loves her (the Office) There's a little extra music over this that the uploader added. During this scene you're totally there with Jim. When she breaks his heart she breaks ours as well




4. Jack and Kate Find Charlie Hung in a tree (Lost): Till this day this is probably one of my favorite scenes on Lost ever. There's a moment where we pull away and we're looking down on them like the scenes about to end and all the adreniline rushes away and you're caught in this reality. It's just brilliant all around.




5. The Ending of It's a Wonderful life: Nothing gets everyone in my fam vaclemped like this.





6. Izzie finds Denny dead (Grey's Anatomy): Such a great scene. You feel so much for her. This scene could of been very common like any other emmotional death scene. But this seemed strangely real and completely honest. Katherine Hiegl deserves all the credit for bringing out all these emotions and and just throwing them into our hands like a hot potato ha




7. The Ending of Into the Wild: Just Brilliance. See the movie.

8. Jack and Kate say goodbye (Lost): There are just so many layers to this scene. It's just so emotionally intertwining.




*Jate Honorable mention: Jack and Kate's first kiss: This is the greatest kiss ever. Everything about this scene is so captivating.





9. The Notebook Kiss: Just Amazing




10. Derek talks about Meredith's shampoo: This scene makes you believe in the possibility of good men.




11. The Ending of Atonement DON'T WATCH IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE MOVIE: I sobbed
Give Love you guys. It's free.



: )